So today has been awesome and shit. I spent most of today working on a brief and then got a call at about 3 from a friend of mine who had a spare ticket to the ballet because her other friend had pulled out at the last minute, so I got to go to the ballet at the Royal Opera House, which was just a dream come fucking true. Ballerinas are, it goes with saying, amaze-balls thinspo if ever I've seen. Although they are lot more muscular than I would like for myself. Anyway, it was really amazing and totally inspirational. Dance is something that has always appealed to me on an emotional level and I got teary during a few of the dances. Mostly during one scene where there was a coat used as a metaphor for love. And how even though you want to take it off sometimes, you like the warmth that it provides. It made me think. The ballerina fought for a coat, but in the end she got rejected. Sad stuff.
Anyway, so that was really awesome. What was also awesome was that I weighed in at 64.0 this morning which is exactly what I wanted, but then my friend and I went for dinner. I had eaten a tuna salad for lunch with my usual coffees and what not. But obviously, if I had known that there was gonna be dinner, I wouldn't have had the salad at all. Anyway, I tried to go for low-carb, low-cal. But the menu was impossible. Fish and chips, fish cakes, deep fried, oil and carbs. *cry* I had a steak with a bit of bearnaise sauce and fries, which I only ate a few of. And then mango sorbet for dessert. It was a two course meal and since this girl knows about my ana ways, I didn't want her to be on my case. I really didn't want to eat the bearnaise, the fries or more than a few mouthfuls of the sorbet, but I did end up eating it. I'm a bit sad, because it means that my total for today is probably somewhere around 1800. I'm hoping though that since I walked up this huge flight of stairs and did a fair amount of walking around Covent Garden in heels that it won't be too awful tomorrow morning. *please let me not gain, please let me not gain, PLEASE LET ME NOT GAIN* Tomorrow will be better.
Love & Ballet
Xo Xo
3 comments:
Awesome that you got to see the ballet but so un awesome that unexpected plans ruined your food intake plans. I soooo hate it when that happens.
The Ballet! How lovely.
I'm so jealous you go to go to the Opera House! I was a dancer all through my growing up and I absolutely miss it every fucking day! Except for the random dance parties I throw in my bedroom sometimes, or kitchen, or living room, or while I'm cleaning, or any time I'm alone really, or with my sister or best friend. I dance a lot.
Anyways, a way that has helped me escape pressured meals like that is being a vegetarian. Obviously I'm not telling you 'Don't ever eat meat!" or whatever, that's my choice and yours but I don't think it would be weird or abnormal if you were to say that you're trying to 'cut back on meat' or 'giving it a try' or 'seeing if I'm able to do it' something to that affect, just to get out of a meal. If I"m being completely honest with you, the entire reason I became a vegetarian was to cloak my ED, it gets me out of eating SO much shit.
I am a bit embarrassed to say I have no idea what Bernaise sauce is, I am seriously about to google it right after I post haha...
Awesome shit that you're losing and going down!
love always!
loveylou
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