Where The Fuck Is Piggy?

HELLOOOOO! It's been ages, mostly because I have been travelling around for work and haven't had a chance to get my laptop out. Sounds like a totally rubbish excuse, I know. Anyway, so I'm a hundred ton bus, because in Italy I ate almost everything that I could get my hands on. Seriously, I must've been averaging about 5000cals a day. Not even remotely exaggerating. What I learnt however is that I really don't like Italy. Italian men are were stalkery perverts. I don't know how the fuck women actually live in that place with the men constantly ogling at you. Like what the actual fuck. I also spent all my money there, which has meant that I am now totally broke, only 32 more hours until payday. So there is the silver lining. My intake today has been fine although no idea what it was exactly. I had soup for lunch, a skinny hot choc and a mountain of popcorn. 

On the man front, I'm not sure if I have ever mentioned Luka - he is 29, a baker, tattoos, skinny jeans, stretch ear thing, bald, Northern (i.e. he speaks like the Starks of Winterfell a.k.a HOT) and totally sexy. He is however a total food snob and as a result of being a baker, completely obsessed with food. It may be a horrific nightmare. But let's see. Anyway, so we went out just before my trip to Italy and it was amazing. He didn't try to feel me up or grab me or anything. Total gentleman, although I feel like he has a relationship agenda on the brain, which obviously, I'm not feeling. Anyway, we are going out on Saturday to three different places in Kings Cross, although I have no idea where any of these are... He's planned the whole thing, whereas I plan to just look gorgeous and eat as little as possible. 

Work is also going well, I've been tasked with launching an awards division at work, so like renewable energy awards ceremonies, which is a HUGE fucking deal. With this I will hopefully get to go to Mexico, Panana and Amsterdam (although I've already been there and am going back for Christmas) - which is EPIC and hopefully a lot more money, etc. etc. 

So all things considered, things are going well right now. I'm horny as all fuck, but I need to keep it together on Saturday, because I'm trying to be a classy lady. Fat as fuck though, but I am going to restrict until Christmas and get the weight down, down, down. 

Peace & Love

Xo Xo

Fast!

Have decided to do a spontaneous fast until Sunday evening at 5pm - anyone keen to join? When I say fast, I mean tea and coffee inclusive.

Peace & Love

Xo Xo

And I'm Back

Binge and starve, binge and starve. This is my life. Binge. And. Starve.

Binging & Starving
Xo Xo

So I Weighed...

And it wasn't awful. I was 66.0kg on the dot. Actually, I'm quite pleased with that and the not weighing over the weekend was really great motivation. The plan is that I am only going to weigh in one weeks time and I am hoping to be in the 64's. I am not getting ahead of myself, I've given myself 4 months to get back down to 60, so if I'm only 1lb down next week, that's okay. Anyway, so my intake for today has been around 700 which consisted of a lentil soup (130), coffee and tea (60), nut roast (240), avocado salad (150), hot chocolate and ketchup... in fact, it may be closer to 800, but I can deal with 800. I'm not feeling fucked though... like dizzy and shit and I've restricted properly for a week and a half now, so that's positive. Usually the dizziness and weakness kicks in after a couple of days. ANYWAY, so I'm chuffed about that. 

Peace & Love 

Xo Xo

Things To Be Proud Of

Today, I have two things to be proud of, so besides the shit storm that is my personal life right now - I will tell you nonetheless. First thing is food related - I was STARVING last night (good, right?), I cracked and had a jacket potato with beans for lunch (600?) so with that, instead of having a big dinner, I had an avocado and rocket salad (150) and some hot chocolate (40). So even though it was a bumpy start, about 800 tops for the day. There was a bad start and then I made the decision to not go further.

The second thing to be proud of today is that I had a strategy meeting with my boss and she has asked me to launch a new series. I'm super excited, not because of the series, but rather because it means that I will be able to tag onto other events (including MEXICO MOTHER FUCKERSSSS!). Anyway, that's exciting and I'm super stoked. I'm really proud that my boss has recognised that I've been busting my ass for the past few months. I'm really happy. I'm wondering if there is a promotion somewhere in the works. I can only be hopeful. 

Anyway, so this is my day. I'm not even thinking about Lukasz anymore, I'm only thinking of my silver linings right now. SILVER LININGS = WORK! 

Peace & Love

Xo Xo

Sometimes, You Gotta Cry

Well, the 'thing' if you can even call it that, with Lukasz has fallen spectacularly to shit. Through the week when we were messaging each other, I had asked him if he could fetch me on the way to the party in Clapham on Friday night. His response was that he had a late meeting and so he couldn't say and that I shouldn't rely on him. I said to him that I only wanted to go at around 8 anyway, so no big deal. But he kept banging on about this 'late meeting', so I kinda left it at about 3pm on Friday saying - you could've just said no, but nevermind I'll see you later. Still hopeful at that point that I was going to get a little action on Friday night. Then as I am getting ready to leave the house to go to the party, Monika sent me a pic of her and Lukasz in full make up on the bus going to the party together. As in - he had fobbed me off and LIED TO ME about this late meeting for the dumbest reason in the world - i.e. that he was going to get ready with Monika - why the lie? Then Monika told him I called him a liar, etc etc. So for Friday, I completely ignored him and have continued to do until this afternoon where I kinda went columbine on his ass on whatsapp, blocked him all over everything - moving right along then. ANYWAY, he obviously knew what he had done and that I knew about it because he hasn't even tried to talk to me. So guess what ladies? I got played. Go. Me. I deserve it for what I did to David. I totally deserve it. 

All this drama has of course been epic motivation for restricting. Friday I had about 600 cals but then like a MILLION in jager and vodka. Yesterday similarly, I must've had about 1500 - consisting of a goats cheese ciabatta, small coffee, insalata tricolore, melazane alla parmigiana, limonchello and a small slice of bread. Millions of calories. Today thus far I have had about 400 calories consisting of a salad and two cups of skinny hot chocolate, a cup of tea... and that's it. I've got a mushroom and stilton nut roast for dinner, SO I should end somewhere around 700/800 depending on how much more hot chocolate I have... it is what helps me starve. 

I've also got laryngitis. AWESOME. 

FUCK THIS WEEKEND IN THE ASS! FUCK. IT!

Peace & Love

Xo Xo