Sunday, November 2, 2014

Sometimes, You Gotta Cry

Well, the 'thing' if you can even call it that, with Lukasz has fallen spectacularly to shit. Through the week when we were messaging each other, I had asked him if he could fetch me on the way to the party in Clapham on Friday night. His response was that he had a late meeting and so he couldn't say and that I shouldn't rely on him. I said to him that I only wanted to go at around 8 anyway, so no big deal. But he kept banging on about this 'late meeting', so I kinda left it at about 3pm on Friday saying - you could've just said no, but nevermind I'll see you later. Still hopeful at that point that I was going to get a little action on Friday night. Then as I am getting ready to leave the house to go to the party, Monika sent me a pic of her and Lukasz in full make up on the bus going to the party together. As in - he had fobbed me off and LIED TO ME about this late meeting for the dumbest reason in the world - i.e. that he was going to get ready with Monika - why the lie? Then Monika told him I called him a liar, etc etc. So for Friday, I completely ignored him and have continued to do until this afternoon where I kinda went columbine on his ass on whatsapp, blocked him all over everything - moving right along then. ANYWAY, he obviously knew what he had done and that I knew about it because he hasn't even tried to talk to me. So guess what ladies? I got played. Go. Me. I deserve it for what I did to David. I totally deserve it. 

All this drama has of course been epic motivation for restricting. Friday I had about 600 cals but then like a MILLION in jager and vodka. Yesterday similarly, I must've had about 1500 - consisting of a goats cheese ciabatta, small coffee, insalata tricolore, melazane alla parmigiana, limonchello and a small slice of bread. Millions of calories. Today thus far I have had about 400 calories consisting of a salad and two cups of skinny hot chocolate, a cup of tea... and that's it. I've got a mushroom and stilton nut roast for dinner, SO I should end somewhere around 700/800 depending on how much more hot chocolate I have... it is what helps me starve. 

I've also got laryngitis. AWESOME. 


Peace & Love
Xo Xo


missinsanity. said...

darling, you're not a failure. and fuck this guy, he's a dick. you don't deserve it. fuck the popular girl at your job. she's a twat. and, pardon me for fucking so many things, but fuck monika too.

fuck laryngitis. and fuck this weekend. i'm right there with you. fuck everything, except you, friend.

there's only love for you, fellow cat lover. cheer up, mate. xx

Roxie Rice said...

Like, what the hell is wrong with that guy?!? I would've gone psyco on his ass as well. The only thing you can do now is ignore those people and concéntrate on yourself. Show that guy what he missed out on, ok?