Friday, September 25, 2015

Give Me Strength

I am disgusting - honestly, my body, my face, my skin, my mind. I am disgusting. I'm packing to go to Cape Town and I am too fat for most of my clothes. Well, I'm 40 hours into a fast and want to make it till my meal on the plane tomorrow night. I can do this, but I also do need to eat that melon in my fridge or it will go off. So maybe I'll eat that tomorrow before I leave for the airport, I will have to lug a huge bag across London so actually, maybe the calories will be good for strength. It's 200 calories for the whole thing... so ja. It should be fine. Fasting for two days, give me strength to make it through the next 8 hours. 

Peace & Love
Xo Xo

4 comments:

Violet said...

I know this feeling so well right now.

It seems as though everything goes to hell when I stop minding my appetite. Like my entire body begins expanding and putrefying, starting with my complexion.

Fasting helps resettle the mind and body. But remember to eat some healthy, wholesome food, to nourish your strength and resolve. :)
Good luck!

no more please said...

I have been following your blog for years now. I had anorexia. Over the last few years there have been many counselling sessions which I swore blind weren't working, yet some how I feel released from the hold anorexia had on me. That's not to say I don't think about it, when I feel low it creeps on back and I end up back on this site. It scares me to see so many of the blogs I once followed closely are still going on. I genuinely hope you are ok and have some support. xxx

no more please said...

I have been following your blog for years now. I had anorexia. Over the last few years there have been many counselling sessions which I swore blind weren't working, yet some how I feel released from the hold anorexia had on me. That's not to say I don't think about it, when I feel low it creeps on back and I end up back on this site. It scares me to see so many of the blogs I once followed closely are still going on. I genuinely hope you are ok and have some support. xxx

Sam Lupin said...

you are not disgusting. you are nowhere near disgusting.

you are incredible and i'm so sad that you can't see past the disgusting feelings.

"Well, I'm 40 hours into a fast and want to make it till my meal on the plane tomorrow night." this really breaks my heart. i hope you do eat at the plane. i hope that you eat a bit more. i hope you enjoy your food. you really don't deserve this. there's something that hurts me about someone purposely abstaining from food still today.

i love you so so much. eat that watermelon, love.

-Sam Lupin