Saturday, May 14, 2016

Closing In On The Next Goal

So as of this morning, I am 65.7kg - which means that I am less than one measly kilogram away from my next goal. I haven't been this weight in like... two years? It feels fucking great. My knees aren't so flabby, I can see my shoulder blades and my shoulder joints are starting to peek through. I remember first seeing a thigh gap at 64kg, so I'm excited for that again. I am also starting to see my hips, but not in the front like normal people, but on the side - it almost squares out. It's great - basically. 

I will be on track for my 1kg a week loss if I'm under 65 by Monday, but realistically, that will probably only happen by Wednesday. Not least of which because I'm going for brunch in a few hours and then to a burlesque festival. 

The question that I ask myself is where I'm going to stop. My goal has always been below 60 - but I also have been questioning recently what other people would think of me if I was that weight again... I mean - I don't want to draw attention to myself. BUT - I WASN'T THAT THIN! I dunno. I feel like aiming for 60 will lead to 58 will lead to 55 like it did last time and then I'll starve myself down and then binge myself up. I dunno. I feel like I need to have a finish line. 

Anyway for now, I am focused on breaking 65. And then it will be a provisional finish line of 63. I am proud of the way that I have done this loss - I mean I have been restricting, but aiming for 800 cals a day sometimes going over and allowing myself a cheatmeal, which pushes the cals up. My cheat meal this week was an Indian meal with David - who then stayed over. It's no vibes or anything, I just still like to see him every now and then...

Peace & Love
Xo Xo


Aye Ell said...

Way to go lady! I know what you mean with the "where do I stop" question. Even at my thinnest (which was like, 10 years ago, ugh) I still remember thinking "Well, maybe just a few more pounds". I had no idea that people were worried about me at that weight. It wasn't until I gained from there that people expressed their concern about that weight. You should have the body you want to have. It's not about others' concerns. How do YOU want to look AND feel?

Lolita said...

You and I are around the same weight currently then. I wish I had the perks of feeling great though :)

Love <3 xx

David Dane said...

You are a really nasty human.... Calling me a douche back because I was trying to share with you.... I was not spamming you... I assure you, I am not going to forget about this... !