Basically, because I'm such a fat disgusting whale, I've gone back on the detox. I'm on day 2 now. I forgot how nice it is to be on this diet and I haven't even thought of cheating yet. My calories are still way too high, but I'm going to do it like I did last time, which is that the first week I'm not going to restrict too much, just as long as I eat only the foods that are on it. If you recall, it's paleo. Except I'm allowing myself milk. The reason my calories have been so high is because of nuts. I've been eating nuts. I can't tell you what my weight was this morning, but it was disgustingly high. I hate it. I'll let you know what it is tomorrow. I need to not be so fat anymore.
My German and I are just perfect, except I've been having little meltdowns with him, because I'm totally in love and I can't deal with the fact that he's not here. The nice thing about it is that his meltdowns on the subject are worse than mine. For the first time, I'm not the craziest person in this wannabe relationship. He told me that he loves me on Monday. It was magic. ANYWAY. I suspect he is the reason behind my fatness, but he is also going to be my new motivation to get thin again - back down to 58. And then to 55. It has been a proper year since I was that weight. I hate my fatness, but I will be perfect.
Peace & Love