Wednesday, December 10, 2014

MOO. I'm A Cow.

I had chocolate for breakfast AGAIN.
Moo. I'm a cow.

I had sausage, beans, mushrooms and chips for lunch AGAIN.
Moo. I'm a cow.

I had soup, mango and hot chocolate for dinner.
Moo. I'm a cow.

I've got my period and I'm bloated.
Moo. I'm a mutha fucken cow.

I tried on my dress for the office christmas party.
Moo. I'm a FUCKING cow.

I ran from the car because it was raining and felt my fat arse jiggling in the rain.
Moo. I'm a goddamn cow.

Grass & Barley
Xo Xo


Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ│͍͢⃝Ṣαᵯ ȽuРіῄ│❀✿ ⱴ⁄ said...

can i punch you to regain some sense into you?
you are not a cow. i'm pretty sure cows don't menstruate.
<3 <3 <3
i'm most likely to eat chocolate for breakfast than any other time in the day, though i have been known to sneak around and eat it at dinner too. shhhh.
that does not sound like a lot of food to my somewhat recovered mind. shhhhhhhh. i'm in recovery (somewhat). i know what i'm talking about.
also, also, also... GRASS AND BARLEY!!!

-Sam Lupin

Calla Lily said...

I'm on Sam's side here - you're not a cow. I've been struggling with chocolate as well, so I made myself give it away to my 5 housemates instead. But then I went ahead and bought more yesterday. OINK. If we are farm animals, let's at least try to be positive and upbeat. Hang in there! XO Calla

Charlie said...

If you're a cow, I'm a cow. Lol.
But seriously, you are so far from being a cow it's not even remotely funny.
Also, Christmas parties should just not be allowed because who wants to dress up while feeling fat from all the chocolate that seems to magically appear EVERYWHERE during the holidays?