Saturday, September 21, 2013

Oh Gurrrrl, if he's over 30 and single - there is a reason why!!

I swear, I may need to get a restraining order or something, because this dude, Ian. Completely freaks me out. Like - he is so weird and creepy. For example, I was telling him that I love iOS7 (#geekmoment) and I told him that it has a compass. His response, you ask? "My mind is a compass." Ya, and everything he says is some kind of weird .... bastardisation of what I had just said. Like a beat poet or something. I don't know. So, yesterday I got into this huge fight with my boss, because I am sick of her micromanaging me, so I was literally in the worst mood ever and I just wanted to get baked and bong-out. Without asking - he brought around some "cabbage", but he didn't want any. Anyway, after some time - like - an hour, I asked him to leave, because he was creeping me out so much. And to be honest, I just didn't feel safe around him. Nonetheless, he asked if he could stay a bit longer... okay (WTF, WTF). Then he asked if he could finish his drink (DAFUQ!?), then he started to look like he was going to fall asleep (GTFO!). So I then asked him if he had any plans for tomorrow, i.e. today and he immediately perked up and we made provisional plans to go ice skating today. And then he was like okay, cool. I'll see you tomorrow. And he left. I swear. to. fuck. I'm going to go outside later today and he's going to fucking be there waiting. He is so creepy. I swear. I need to get the cops on speeddial. He's so creepy. Like he told me that he watches a lot of fantasy gay rape porn. Now - excuse me for being naiive, but wouldn't you fucking maybe think you should a detail like that to yourself for at least the first few weeks that you know someone!? Fo'rils - that shit is just not something you share after knowing someone for three days. Anyway, so obviously I'm going to either cancel or just ignore this guy, lock my doors and keep the cats inside, but ya. Fuck it. That was my Friday night. Bleak that he knows where I live though. Anyway, this brings me to reinforce my previous idea that if he is over 30 and single - there is a fucking good reason why! 

Anyway, day... 5ish or 6 - mission vegan is going well. I'm actually doing really well and I really an enjoying it. Don't know that I'm feeling any healthier, but then again - I'm quite baked. BOOM!

Love & Naan
Xo Xo

7 comments:

Sar said...

Haha I hear you about men being single past 30...this dude you're describing sounds weird but he may be just socially awkward and totally harmless.

I wish I had some "cabbage" I've been asking everyone I know haha so hopefully later! The only good thing about not having any is I'm wide awake at 9:30AM with energy to burn.

Have a great weekend!
xo

Sam Lupin said...

give him a dildo and say GO
"cabbage"
...-sigh-
what a mad bloke
omg 'lock the doors and keep the cats inside'
you're too much for me to handle sometimes x
baked?
hot.

-Sam Lupin

xXTokyoVanityXx said...

"keep the cats inside"
Fucking cracking line. Had me in insane giggles for 20 minutes, the kind where you sound like a seal lion having sex and then stop producing any kind of sound completely. Oh my God. Legendary. xxx

xXTokyoVanityXx said...

*stops laughing*


Wait...

you like iOS7...?
...Dude how much have you been smoking? =p
xxx

Tatyana said...

OMG... I have no idea what to say. That guy IS creepy weird, no wornder he is single. And yea, just to be safe keep your cats in :D

Katie Elizabeth said...

Reading your posts always make me laugh my ass off. I deff think that you need to tell him to just leave you alone. And good job on the vegan thing. I'm so proud of you beautiful!
XOXO

NeoHippie said...

Run! seriously this guy sounds really fucked up. I dated someone who sounds pretty similar once and it took me nearly a year before he would messaging me all the freaking time. And we only date for a couple weeks. Be safe ok!