So last basically... I mean the whole of yesterday, I was pmsing like a mutha fucker. In addition to being in an exponentially negative mood, I was also just a little weepy in general. It is the season of masterchef Australia (holla at my fellow addicts) and the sentimental stories just causes hours of inexplicable crying.
This then led to a binge, I mean - it wasn't huge, but it wasn't good. So today needs to be a strict day I think. I'm gonna aim for 800 cals. And tomorrow also... Maybe I'll just go till the end of the work week.
Anyway, to my comments -
Re: Colbey, I knoooooow right!? And he has the gall to want to see me in London. The way that I feel about is if I'm honest is that I want to see him, but I know I'm going to be an emotional fuckwit, probably lament over how much of an ass he is and then because he is emotionally incapable of processing anything I'm saying, I'll get irrationally angry that he doesn't "get it" and it will basically prove what I already know - which is that it's a bad idea to see him and it's going to give me none of the satisfaction that I want and leave me more pissed off with him than if I hadn't seen him in the first place. So, yeah. I can't totally promise that I won't see him, but I already know it will end badly. I've of course never been the kind of person who will steer away from calamity even though I see it coming. *facepalm Piggy, facepalm*
Re: Stand-up, yes I really do hope that I slay. I mean, in the depths of my rampant imagination, I do wonder if I'll be good and whether I'm funny enough to get a few more gigs and actually do this as a real hobby, but I don't know. I do also promise that if it goes well I'll put the video on here for y'all to see. I need to make sure I'm super good with my diet though. Fat Piggy on stage, the idea makes me laugh.
I've also decided that I'm officially giving up men. They just aren't adding value to my life. So I'm going to see out this Tyler sitch and if we get married in October like planned, then so be it. I honestly don't see it happening.
Yesterday, I booked my diving course in Egypt. So now I just need to get my visa and I'm A-for-away. I got some random changes to my flight itinerary, which have essentially added an hour to my flight time for reasons that are not quite clear. I hope that this means that they've implemented a whole buttload of new security checks at Istanbul airport. I really don't look good riddled with bullets or blown up. YOLO?
Wish me luck for today? I am going to persevere with a good attitude and no binge!
Peace & Love