Thursday, September 6, 2012

How Is This Possible?

I am enormous. So huge in fact that I'm sure my thighs have doubled in size. To be fair I have been stoning since I got back to London on Sunday. Tomorrow is the girls night and i'm nowhere near thin enough and all I want is to eat. But I can't because otherwise I'm going to be a fatter uglier piglet than I could possibly be after two good days. I don't even want to weigh myself. I'm listening to really sad sad music at the moment, reflective of this bullshit disgusting self-control ABSENT state of being that I currently find myself in. Coco is absolutely furious with Piggy for being so disgusting. Awful, AWFUL, AWFUL.

Thoughts of CrapBag are becoming less frequent... which is really strange. For once I have gone almost a whole week without pity crying about it, but now this has been replaced with pity eating. Or happy eating. I don't know. Anyway, Grem and I have to move at the end of the month since my landlady isn't happy about me having Gremlin. Oh well. I wanted to move anyway.

Today I had about 600 cals so far and I'm going to bed now. Fuck that.

28D36D89 & Love
Xo Xo

6 comments:

Miranda said...

I feel huge and disgusting too. It's a terrible feeling. Hope you feel better.

Emma said...

Yep. I binged yesterday. Cake, pizza, chips. I made myself sick >.<
I'm three day fasting now.
Take care love <3
-Emma

Emily Anonymous said...

It seems like everyone is binging these days!
Your blog helps me because you let out all those negative feelings about having binged and then you can still come back from it with some work.
It's so hard to try and rein myself in but since I know other people can do it it becomes easier.
Thanks!

WinterA said...

I am sorry you are having a off day. I will say this is an off day. As for getting stoned.....sometimes that is needed to keep us sane. I am going out with my friend next week and I am hoping to not feel so fat as well.

Awwww doesn't like gremlin. Her lost. At least you get to go and live somewhere you will be happy.

❤ ♥ Sam [Misha] Lupin ❥ ❣ said...

your thighs have no doubled in size.
Coco? tehehe. i laik it. <3 I WANT AN ALTERNATIVE EGO. three just won't cut it (nor Blaine nor George nor me). i think my non-existent straight half needs a name. a manly name. like Sylvester Stallone or Jason Stathom. Unfortunately, some fuckers already stole my names. xD.
Lovely intake, loaf. <3
RTD2 (what are we doing?) & loaves of steel,
-George DiCaprio

Mandane Sweeten said...

It's ok! You can do it. I've been super terrible recently. I'll just sit there and feel all my fat. It's so disgusting. I hope that I can join y'alls little Ana Community because I really need to be better. Anyways. Good luck! Cheers to Goal Weights!