Sunday, September 9, 2012

TODAY! - Enough NOW!

Guys, the absolute worst thing on the planet that could ever happen to a person happened to me yesterday. I went out to watch the rugby with friends of mine and they actually told me that I looked better having put on some weight. What. The. Fuck. Firstly, they both know about my issues, why would you ever say that you actually notice how fat I am. And secondly, goddammit! You know sometimes when you put on a bit of weight, you hope that no one actually notices. I don't want to look normal, I want to be skinny. Sick looking. Skinny. So today, mark my words, TODAY! I am starting today, tomorrow and Tuesday with a fruit fast. Only tea with a teeny bit of milk and fruit. Then Wednesday through Saturday will be 600 cal days. I'm weighing in tomorrow morning to see exactly what the damage is. Hopefully I won't have a heart attack when I get on the scale.

In other news, I'm fat and i can't concentrate on anything else.

Fuck it & Love
Xo Xo

12 comments:

The Secret Me said...

I shall join you on this fruit fast!!! The kids I nanny told me I look bigger..... :O but I will do Monday through Wednesday seeing as I am about to go to sleep!!!! I hope the damage isn't too bad hun x

Skylar Rainn said...

When I lost weight no one noticed and if they did they never said anything but they were all so damn quick to point out when I put some weight back on. They tried to flatter me with some comment about my 'chubby cheeks' and my 'curves'!

cosmicbaby said...

Uggggh, I haaaaate that!
It's weird because my boyfriend literally texted me tonight and said "You're so sexy and curvy right now, I love it!". Which to me means, you're getting fat, but it's okay, meanwhile talking about how hot Megan Fox is. Riight, cause Megan Fox is curvy. I seeem to notice that it's the people that know you have issues or whatever that say this stupid shit, I don't know if they're trying to help or just being morons, but it's not doing me any good either way loool.
Anyways, good luck, I'm sure the damage isn't too, too bad. And sorry people don't understand.

❤ ♥ Sam [Misha] Lupin ❥ ❣ said...

since we're on a streak of what people said about our weight/appearance, my Mother said 'are your boobs bigger? did you gain weight?'
okay, babe. to be honest, i'm fasting today on...coffee...with creamer and Splenda [yeah. fuck me.] because i had a horrific b/p today. you and i can does this!
-Sam Lupin

WinterA said...

I am so sorry to hear that. When I read that I was "awwwwwwww" my husband thought something was seriously wrong. I told him it is a girl thing.

I agree with you. You never say that to anyone who has put on weight. I don't believe any female when they say that. I mostly think some of them say as in "yeah I am glad you are not the skinnest anymore" Then they know about your issues. Not cool.

Don't worry. You are gonna get back on track and show them who is boss. Either way I am sure you are still doing better than them with losing weight and maintaining.

Tatyana said...

Sorry about that. It sucks.... people are sometimes so rude when they think they're being nice.

I would love to join your fast. But I know it's impossible right now. I got people around me all the time and I need to work really hard to even get away with lunch!!

désespérée de maigrir said...

No matter what, you are lovely and beautiful... I'm sure you look great, and I'm sorry you can't feel that way too.

Rationally, you don't want to be sick. But irrationally, I get it.

Lots of love and big hugs... don't be too stressed, fruits and veggies will do you well.

Emily Anonymous said...

Oh god, how horrible that must have been! To actually have someone point out to you that you've gained weight...
I guess the only upside is that you know you have friends who care about you, even if they have no idea how to care.
Maybe tell them how awful it makes you feel when they notice you've put on weight?

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry! I am new to this, and have decided that with everything in life to be pro-ana. I need somewhere for support and this seems like a great place where people that actually understand me will be. I hate being fat, and I hate being surrounded by skinny people. soon enough they will be jealous of us! Fuck those bitches who think they are better. Whatever the scale says, tell it you and ana are going to fuck its shit up the next time you meet!

Miss•Genna said...

Oh hunny, I beat you with the worst insult, asking if I was pregnant. Wtf! People are rude. You never say that to a women, especially not one with extreme body issues. I mean the guy who asked if I was pregnant saw me right after my smoke free, binge 10lbs gain week. Of course I'm gonna be bloated. Needless to say its always the best reverse thinspo. Dropped 14lbs since that comment, so can you!

Atty said...

Oh my god Piggy I feel the same way. Today I realized how fat I was and looked and that was ALL I thought about the entire outing. I honestly couldn't forget about it or put it in the back of my mind. Nothing worse.

C.A.Walt said...

Oh gosh, I hate when people point that out!! Its like I can lose 10lbs and you don't say a thing but I gain back two (blehh) and they wanna congradulate me?! That is not a fricking accomplishment....