Oh you guys make me, my god do you ever. Some of the comments I get sometimes make me giggle like a schoolgirl, especially Sam. You are a strange young lady, but I'm really glad that I know you. It's one of those things that make having this little rant space that much better - having awesome people to share it with. So thank you all. I do get so despondent about this blog sometimes, like feeling like I don't have enough of a life to write about it here. But I suppose, I am at the tail end of a pretty crazy journey with all of this shit. As long as people continue to read, I'll continue to write.
So, I suppose, it is high time that I actually reveal my weight. This morning, it was 65.2kgs. Which is ten kgs up from what it was nine months ago. When I started the detox 17 days ago it was 69.4. So in fact - I basically put on almost all the weight I lost over the break up period with the ex. But. Losing about 10lbs in 17 days, is making me hopeful. I am starting to recognise my body again. I only have another 20lbs to go and then I'll be back to where I was. I suppose in theory, another five weeks and i should be there. At the moment, I am aiming for 4lbs a week. Also, so far it is going great.
Today, I've had... about 520 cals which consisted of 1tbsp of honey, a cup of milk (both for my coffee), two tiny bananas and two eggs. I'm happy with that intake, especially since yesterday turned out to be under 300. I'm hoping to get below 65 tomorrow. I must say though, actually having weight to lose. Like compared to trying to maintain the weight which is what I was doing when I put it all back on again - is a fuckload easier. Having a target and working towards it has definitely helped. I mean, I suppose that when you are at a goal weight you rationalise that one bag of chips isn't going to kill you. When in fact, its only because you've forgotten how to approach food. Once again, I'm completely pedantic about what I eat. I can't wait for my binge day which is in 13 days, although at the moment, I'm not missing that food at all. This detox really has been the best thing I've done in a long time. Carbs and sugar really are devil foods. I think my relationship with food is a lot healthier because of it as well. Because my safe foods don't scare me and I don't get into a little panic guilt trip if I eat them. You know what I mean?
Triceratops & Pterodactyls