Today, I was chatting with a friend... Who may be slightly more than a friend... But for now, let's just call it a friend. I have to say, I'm totally stoked about the idea of a bit of manfriend drama. INTO it. Anyway, so this friend lives up North and he's coming down for four days. He used to live in London, but moved back up to help out on the family farm after he finished his degree. Anyway, so he is coming down for four days this weekend and we're going to *bawm chicca wow waaaaa* - maybe you know. I mean, I'm kinda keen on just being friends, because I am kinda wanting to maybe think about dating again. Sleeping around just doesn't form part of this plan. ANYWAY. I mentioned something about being in hospital and coldplay having been my hospital album. He asked why I was in hospital, so I told him. Because I am not fucking ashamed of the fact that I tried to kill myself twice. I don't care. I don't want peoples shock or judgment. And I especially don't want their pity. But he was like. JESUS PIGGY. Now, I don't want a lecture. And I don't care if people know, because I make no pretenses about the fact that I may be fundamentally screwed up. And you know, at least I have a reason. A reason for everything. Anyway, I'm not sure what significance this had about my post. But you know when some one knows something about you and it kinda changes the way they look at you or feel about you... I think this may have done that.
Calorie-wise today, it has been good. I weighed myself this morning and I am still paying for that binge from Saturday. I can't fucking believe it. Keep strong, keep strong, keep strong. Anyway, so today I have had one cup of coffee (no honey - TADA!) I'm going to have two eggs and two oranges. With more coffee and that is going to be it today. So today will end up being about... 450 for the day. Which is great. I promise that on Monday next week, I will reveal my weight. I promise promise.
Peace & Lovekins