Tuesday, October 22, 2013

Heart Melting

Wow, what an amazingly positive response to my last blog. THANKS GUYS! I'm gonna check out the blog links once I've finished writing this post - thanks for leaving them. If you missed the last one, please post links to your blogs in the comments so I can follow. All my favourite people... Sammy, we must make a plan. <3

So the exciting news is that I got a call to say that one of the companies I interviewed for is going to make an offer - I am just waiting on them to get back to me with the terms, SO hopefully that will come through tomorrow, which is very exciting. I will be producing events in California, Cape Town and somewhere in Europe, to be decided. It is quite literally the hugest weight off my shoulders. The hugest. And fuck my old company in the ass! I'm literally going to their biggest competitor and this company is better than that one. So suck it, you whore GINGER BITCH! (i.e. my former boss)

I kinda celebrated today by getting two small bags of crisps and a small portion of fries, despicable I know. But that's all I've had today, so in effect it's not too bad. Yoga'd. It's fabulous. To answer J's question - I think that I am finding veganism as a healthy medium in my functional ED world. It is keeping me slim enough and still helping me to lose weight, but not through starving too much. So I'm still aiming for a lower intake than is recommended, but as long as the weight keeps coming off, I feel less panicked about eating that amount. Through that I suppose, I feel like I'm coming to a place which isn't going to eventually kill me... I mean. I would rather die than be fat, literally. I wouldn't care and I haven't in the past given two flying fucks about my health as long as I am skinny at the end of it. But I think - and it may be too early to tell as I'm only like... two months into vegan - it may actually be a way of saving my body but giving me what I want at the same time. 

This friend of mine, Danny - wants to come over on Friday and spend the day with me. Him and I have known each other for about three years now. And about six months ago he tried to seduce me on his couch, but I turned him down, because quite frankly it is Danny. And I think he may be coming over to try and revisit that... in fact. I know he is. I don't know if this is something I want or if my cockfright is just kicked into overdrive at the moment. I know that at the end of the day - whatever I'm comfortable with etc etc, but I do think that I want it. But I'm trying to stick to my moral direction of stopping fucking around and making bad decisions. God, I certainly do know how to complicate my own life. Fuck it. 

Love & Jobs
Xo Xo

6 comments:

Katie Elizabeth said...

That is such wonderful news my dear. I hope the offer is what you want and you get to come to the states. Maybe you can make your way to Colorado to see me. =)
Just don't do anything on Friday that you're not comfortable with, but at the same time, you need to feed that need of yours, if you know what I mean. ;) Good job on keeping up with the yoga. That's amazing. Lots of love.
XOXO

Katie Dunning said...

Congrats on the offer! :)
By the way, i just finished setting up my blog ^_^ super excited. here is the link -> http://pro-katie.blogspot.com
i'd be ecstatic if you checked it out!

Calla Lily said...

Super congratulations on the job offer! As Katie advised, do be wary as to what happens on Friday. Actions can't be taken back. I'm certainly suffering from that fact currently. I need to get back in to my yoga routine... I've been too depressed lately to drag my lard ass out of bed to go to my yoga classes. What irony! Keep up your hard work :) X's and O's

désespérée de maigrir said...

Congrats times a million on the job offer. Considering the bullshit you were dealing with at your last job, you deserve an upgrade.

As for veganism, way to embrace it! While I still struggle a lot, it has definitely helped me immensely get into a healthier mindset, since going vegan in 2008.

I wasn't able to comment yesterday, but know I'm always reading. Always, every post!!

Erin said...

Congrats on the job that's great news!

I don't think i posted my blog link on the other post but it's jamandjabberwock.blogspot.com

ꜛⱴאּ Sⱥm ŁupiƝ ҂ said...

all the plans ;D
omg lady lady lady i'm going to go vegan from Oct 24 to Nov 30. i am persuaded. that means no chocolate for 37 days.
oh well - peanut butte is vegan. I KNOW.
omg biggest competitor of your former company...what a way to stick it in their asses hot lady!!
"I would rather die than be fat, literally." thank you.
i'm hoping that as well. i had that in my junk food diet during the depression. sometimes i ate 2000 calories (my maintenance is 1710) and i lost weight from that as well. junk foods are forever safe foods now. crisps, chocolates, biscuits, etc - you name it i'll eat it!
omg 2 months.
that might be grand. honestly, i went for vegan because i know going for high amounts of protein actually makes me physically sick. i have a vendetta with sodium. i bloody want to cry when it goes over 1500mg (consider this - a link of the sausage downstairs is 80 calories and 410mg of sodium!) so i'm hoping this'll help. also help with my skin disorder. i know cutting meat helps and someone says cutting dairy helps too and i am flaring cries cries cries
DANNY is such a sexy name i need a main character named Danny
we have EDs. we complicated our lives the minute we made 3532632726 food rules, decided to strip down our clothing every morning to weigh on our scale three times in a row and wear five layers of clothing when it's scorching hot outside!

~Sam Lupin