Thursday, October 10, 2013

So Guess What?

I got sacked. No like for reals, I got fired. And the funny thing is that I don't give a continental shit in hell about it. When they told me in the meeting, I just laughed. They told me it wasn't funny. I thought it was so go fuck yourself. I was so excited about this job when I first got it and now... I'm just so relieved that it is over. To celebrate or commiserate the occasion, I decided to fuck Sober October in the ass and I drank a bottle of whiskey and got horrendously drunk and ended up cruising around London with the creepy guy on the back of his motorcycle. He might be creepy, but dudes. It was glorious. I have had two interviews since then and have another one on Monday, so I think all in all, I should be okay for a job in the next few weeks. I hope. If not, I might be homeless Piggy, but it will all be okay. Fuck. I just can't work for other people. I have to try. Steve Jobs got fired. Richard Branson got fired. All the best business peeps have been. So my old work can go fuck themselves. They have missed out on something big and that's just the end of it. 

On Tuesday, I was doing well in terms of my cals and my weight. I had a small bunch of lentils for lunch and them came the bottle of whiskey, but to be fair. I only had the lentils and the whiskey so it wasn't the end of the world. Yesterday, being hungover was a total write-off. I shan't even go into what I ate, but it was disgusting. I have decided to allow myself one non-vegan day a week. Which would've been yesterday. Today I've been good. I had some hummus with gherkins (weird combo I know), soup for lunch, a soy latte (the fucking bitch at the coffee store put normal caramel syryp in instead of sugar free and I was in a hurry to catch my train so I didn't stay to make her make me another one - so too many cals there) and for dinner I had a small amount of pearl barley and lentils with mushrooms and leeks. I have managed to stay under 800 for the day, so mission accomplished. I will post my weight tomorrow.Please don't judge me for being fat and disgusting. 

Piggy out. 

Love & Whiskey
Xo Xo

3 comments:

annamaria said...

I'm sure you'll be okay, honey. It's their loss really

Erin said...

If there's any time for whiskey, it's getting fired. We believe in you, I know you're going to find something much better

ꜛⱴאּ Sⱥm ŁupiƝ ҂ said...

"And the funny thing is that I don't give a continental shit in hell about it." as you should. that whore isn't worth giving two shits about
"I decided to fuck Sober October in the ass and I drank a bottle of whiskey and got horrendously drunk and ended up cruising around London with the creepy guy on the back of his motorcycle." only you, FP. only you.
"They have missed out on something big and that's just the end of it. " THERE YOU GO x
i never count syrup calories in coffee. like ever.
that barley
not sure what that is
i just googled it
first quinoa and now this. God knows what's up next

-Sam Lupin
PS. good luck with the scale. i hope it's not too much of an ass