Wednesday, March 28, 2012

London Calling

I have been such a badly behaved piggy in the last week, just eating like a crazed lunatic. I am even too scared to weigh myself. I need to get back into shape for London, which will be happening next week. There was some trouble with my visa, where they had to verify some details, but it should be arriving tomorrow so crisis averted really.

I am so enormous. My stomach looks like I am pregnant. Like fuck. my. life. Anyway, I know I can get this under control. Everyone at my mothers wedding was commenting on how thin they think I am. I was like *mother fuckers* if only you all knew how fat I really am. Fuck fat people. Seriously, they think I need to eat more, but they don't understand that I need to not eat at all. EVER! Why don't people understand this shit? Like - you don't HAVE to eat. As we always say, eat to live, don't live to eat. So, 500 cals a day is more than sufficient.

I apologise for my absence, but I promise to be better now. Well fuck it, I have only been gone for a week so it's okay. But now I need to get rid of all my stuff. My ex and I have been seeing each other again. All I can hope is that he totally falls apart when I leave. Fuck him. Seriously, I want him to hurt, like I hurt when we broke up. I know it's mean, but he fucking deserves it after all the pain.

Um, to answer a question from Annie, I don't "have" acne, but I do go through phases where I have nasty bouts of spots on my face. Usually it is fine, but lately - also depending on how much meat I eat - strange I know - it has been bad. But it is under control, and obviously when I get my period, then I am fat and spotty. It's gross.

Love & London
Xo Xo


Anonymous said...

glad you are doing ok! Hang in there, love.

❤ ♥ Sam [Misha] Lupin ❥ ❣ said...

no crazed lunatic eating, FP! what did i say about that? nothing of course *kisses cheek* <3
dude. the minute i start restricting, it's like everyone can see a .1 loss on my scale that i cannot see!
500 calories a day. God. that sounds like Heaven (when you've been living off 200-300 for three days and now 400. that sounds like a Haven of beauty).
shit. i sound like a starved Nazi. this is just me after 5 days. :P
ahahahaha. now that part made me laugh. and my throat hurts so bad i can only WHISPER to people. fuck you, FP. <3 made me laugh my ass off like that. love you.
Misha you. Mishaaaaaaaaa you.
-Sam Lupin

Beth said...

Very happy your back. absence made the heart grow fonder :) Theres always time to get back on track so don't worry <3

Too Fat for Words said...

Hey just found your blog check mine out we can support each other and keep each other on track.

I'm in London, moved here from Australia nearly a year ago now.

Anonymous said...

Forget all the negativity and only worry about yourself. People always want to bring you down but it's a test. Everyday is a fresh start.

I followed, support?