Friday, November 23, 2012

All I want to do...

All I want to do right now is order a jumbo thin crusted quattro fromagi, fish and chips, pesto pasta and a trough of ice cream. Oh my god girls, it is literally taking all of me right now to stop myself from ordering it. I have been looking at the website that does these deliveries, mentally making a note of the things that I am GOING to order. And then, I try to focus on that shoot on Tuesday and the fact that I am five days without a binge. I can do this, I can do this, I can do this. All I want is to stop wanting to eat everything. I can do this. Tomorrow is rugby so I know I am going to drink, so I can't binge out tonight. Sunday, family friends are coming to bring my couch round and then they want to go have breakfast, so I am going to be forced to eat there as well. I cannot binge. I cannot binge. I cannot binge. Today, I have already had about 530 calories and I'm not hungry. I had a pear, tea with milk, a small bowl of cereal and about a cup of pasta (without any sauce, I figured I'd rather have more pasta than sauce). So I'm still okay, no binging Piggy, Coco needs to keep me strong. THiNK of the shoot. This morning I was 60.5 so things are still going okay. I know I can make it through the rest of the evening. I just need to finish this paper I'm working on and then I can crawl up into bed and go to sleep. Once I'm in bed, I'll be fine. I will be fine. I will be fine. No binging Piggy, Coco needs to be present for the shoot on Tuesday, no one wants to photograph a whale. I think I'm trying to talk myself into it. LOL. OKAY. I can do this. You can eat Pizza another time, but right now is not the time for weakness. Right now is the time for skinniess and self-control. I will break 60 tomorrow. Five days without a binge. I CAN DO THIS.

Love & Strength
Xo Xo

11 comments:

Skylar Rainn said...

The last thing you want is to feel bloated on your shoot. Think of how much they are looking forward to seeing YOU. This is YOUR time to shine so tiger don't spoil it. Make yourself a promise. Hey when the shoot is done you can binge to your hearts content (for awhile) as a mini reward but hold out til then!! xxx

Stephanie Ray-leigh said...

I'm doing the same thing you are--trying not to binge. But I just want to eat. So badly.
Good luck babe<3

Breathe~ said...

You can absolutely do it ^^ you are way stronger than you think im sure, This photoshoot is SUCH a big motivator to not binge, im so proud of you for resisting the temptation; I know how very hard it gets @__@
Good luck and lots of love ^^

Breathe ~

That Girl said...

I just binged .. And I can tell you. It's not fucking worth it! Don't do it. Be strong. I feel like shut and you don't wanna do that. 60,5 that's amazing! You've lost more than 1 kg this week. Think of that! Think of the shoot . Fuck food, you're better than that!

S. said...

down a load of water and keep yourself distracted. i want to binge so bad, but 5 non binge days is amazing! i dont think ive managed 2 yet!!

keep strong
xxxx

Loopy Lucie said...

I wish I could be as strong as you, Ive had a terrible day x

Rachel said...

It's totally not worth it, you're so much stronger than that. Don't let the urge overcome you, and just imagine how amazing you'll look on the shoot!! Stay strong:) xx

NeoHippie said...

Be strong. I know it's hard not to binge, but you can do it.

Katie Elizabeth said...

You can do it sweetie. I've got complete faith in you.
XOXO

fuckingpicnic said...

Kind of late to the party, but I hope you made it! When I feel like binging I freeze my cash cards. No money no bingey for Picnic. I do often go window shopping on Tesco online though, filling up a basket with no intention of checking out. It helps me, but only coz I can't buy any of it!

Hang in there.

Emily Anonymous said...

You're doing so great! Don't order it! Go play a game of solitaire or something and ride out the urge. You can do it!