We could walk or job, or even a brisk walk - but we want to run, nay SPRINT. I'm not talking about weightloss oddly enough, I'm talking about life. I think we are trying to define ourselves and figure things out just like we are conditioned to do from such a young age and we feel guilty if we haven't got it all worked out. It is utter rubbish I think. We have more than 50 years to be defined and useful, to contribute, make babies, have jobs and pay tax. So why do we rush through highschool and varsity and try to figure it out? BECAUSE that is what the MAN teaches us. He teaches us to be prodigies, to be special. To figure it all out by 25. Then plateau for the rest of our lives and procreate. FUCK THAT! Gotta stick it to the man. ...Rant. Over.
So yesterday I had four cups of coffee with milk (30), then I had tomato soup (236) and about four thick cut chips (50). So just over 300. I don't think it was too bad actually. It took all that I had in me to not eat the chocolate my lecturer gave us to wish us well for the exam. OR the enormous packet of crisps in the cupboard. Tomorrow maybe I will eat those crisps, but only those crisps for the day. So with my normal coffee it will be about 600 for the day. Which is okay, I mean - it could be lower, but rather eat them and then they are done. Fuck, thinking about it is making me drool. Anyway, so 310 yesterday. Today I have had three cups of coffee with fat free milk (20) and about 60g of Cottage cheese (fat free) and lettuce - (70ish). So I'm rocking 90 for today so far. Tonight I think I am going to get it up to about 500. Well... I may just have soup again... But maybe I'll have something else. 500 is the limit for today. GOD I just want to eat.
I weighed in at 63 flat this morning 139 (Weeeeeeeeeeeeeee, welcome to the 30's. Why thank you!) with my BMI ringing in at... 19.9 (Weeeeeeee welcome to the below 20's) I want to eat to celebrate, but now THAT would be counter productive.
Anyway, so has anyone watched Supersize v Superskinny (programme in UK) I dunno what network it was on, but anyway, so they do this thing with the people on the show by working out how much they eat in a week, how many days they overeat or undereat by in a week. Based on 2000 - 2500 cals per day for a girl and 2200 - 2800 for a boy (I stand to be corrected on this by the way). So lets say that I am supposed to eat 2000 cals a day every day of the week. If I eat 500 cals on average per day for a week, I eat 3500 cals in 7 days. I'm averaging this out because somedays we binge some days we fast. This week, the average will be about 500. That means that in one week instead of eating 14 000 cals (Can you imagine eating this much!?) I eat 3500, which means, I undereat by 5 days worth of food a week. I eat food for 2 days over a whole week. Fuck. How awesome is that? I'm stoked that my bmi is going down.
Thanks for all the comments on my last blog. I will post more all round body pics when I get to 60 (132). Hopefully by the end of next week. Love to my husband and wife (George & Beth), our little polygamy circle - lucky boy George... :p
Peave & Love